sarcastic and caustic look at online dating and the life of single-doom.

Archive for February, 2010

Actual Conversation I just had.

Man is walking towards up to me on the beach. I look away, in every direction but where he is hoping he will move on.

“Can I ask you a question?”

I ignore.

“Do you speak Spanish?”

I shake my head. No.

“Can I tell you about an island that has incredible snorkling?”

“No. I don’t want to hear about it.”

Man sits down. “It’s an island blah blah blah…”

I interupt. “I want to sit her alone and rest.”

Man continues talking.

I interupt again. “I WANT. to sit here. ALONE.”

“You want to sit here alone?”

“YES.”

Silence.

“Ok. Chao.” Still sitting there. Still hasn’t accepted that I want him to go away.

“CHAO,” I reply quickly.

Man finally leaves.

I am going insane. I actually told some tonight to “get the fuck away.” Exact words.